So, here I am, done all the minutiae of life. You know what I’m talking about: laundry, bed making, floor sweeping and pulling ticks off the dog. Or at least I’m done what I wanted to accomplish before I sat down to write a few words. Things are going good, the computer fired up just fine, the internet is working and I have a hot cup of tea with which to restore myself in between: gahs! and, for fuck sakes, she would never say that!

Then the hubby walks in the door…

Him: Hey, you busy?

Me: Yup.

Him: Wha cha doin’?

Me: Writing.

Him:

Me: Tap, tap, tap, tap.

Him: Seeing as you aren’t busy, can you come give me a hand?

Me: *takes two deep breaths* I am busy. See—look—tap, tap, tap.

Him: You’ve got like, fifteen tabs open on your computer, looks more like you’re surfing than writing.

Me: I’m doing research…

Him: *snort* You have Facebook open, and recipes, poultry feed and banking stuff. How’s that writing?

Me: I have Facebook open because I was having a hard time figuring out if I should use i.e. or e.g. and wanted to ask writer-type friends if they knew, I have recipes open because I’m trying to find a dessert that will hide the flavour of some household poisons, then I found out that they put arsenic into chicken feed to make them grow bigger and thought I could use that instead, and I also need to find out how someone could break into a safe built in 1973. It’s all for my story.

Him: 1973? Why 1973?

Me: My protagonist’s grandmother built the safe in 1973. I’m having a hard time finding any information…

Him: What’s a protag-nist?

Me: Protagonist. The main character of my story.

Him: (Pause) So, seeing as you aren’t busy, can you come and help me in the garage. It won’t take long. Five—six hours at the most. I’m trying to build a replica of the flyer the Wright brother’s used for their first flight.

Me:

Him:

Me:

Him: So, is that a yes?

Me:

Him: Why are you grabbing that knife?

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One thought on “Busy World of Death

  1. Haha. Yes, non-creatives must think that ideas just flow forth like water from a fire hose when you sit in front of a computer or put pen to paper. If only being creative were that easy.

    Like

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